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* Ask [[Apple|Steve Jobs]], keeper of jobs | * Ask [[Apple|Steve Jobs]], keeper of jobs | ||
* Sign up to Indeed.com and respond to every listing with something along the lines of "hmm..... indeed........" | * Sign up to Indeed.com and respond to every listing with something along the lines of "hmm..... indeed........" | ||
* Kill someone wealthy (preferably an fossil fuel executive, but anyone with a net worth over £1b will do in a pinch) and absorb their skills and jobs | * [[wikipedia:The_Santa_Clause|Kill someone wealthy (preferably an fossil fuel executive, but anyone with a net worth over £1b will do in a pinch) and absorb their skills and jobs]] | ||
* If you don't have very much money, you could purchase a cheap knockoff job from AliExpress | * If you don't have very much money, you could purchase a cheap knockoff job from AliExpress | ||
* Start a business and then offer yourself a job | * Start a business and then offer yourself a job | ||
* Nepotism | * Nepotism | ||
* Transform an everyday household object into a job using a spell or potion | * Nepaltism (go to Nepal and ask for a job there) | ||
* Go to a | * Transform an everyday household object into a job using a [[Magics|spell or potion]] | ||
* Go to a [[Forest]] with a large Job population and set up three or more traps | |||
* Take over the mind of whoever is interviewing you and convince them that Weezer's latest output has actually been pretty good | * Take over the mind of whoever is interviewing you and convince them that Weezer's latest output has actually been pretty good | ||