PHP

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PHP stands for Phantastic Programming. You can use it to make things happen on pages.

It's different from JavaScript because JavaScript runs in your browser and PHP runs somewhere else I don't know where.They won't tell me where it runs.

Having a PHP

You can make a php script by calling it something.php. It's a good idea to actually call it something/index.php so the URL remains the same if you decide to stop using PHP (a wise choice).

Writing a PHP

You can write a PHP script like this:

<?php
echo "this is my cool script";

There's a pretty okay guide on the PHP website.

The <?php bit tells PHP you're about to write some PHP. You can stop writing PHP and start writing HTML with ?>.

Sometimes you'll want to insert some values from PHPland into your HTML, which you can do like this:

<?php
$my_value = "hello!";
?>

<p>
  <?= $my_value ?>
</p>

Note that if you're rendering user input in this way, you should wrap it in the htmlspecialchars function, lest you become vulnerable to an XSS (Cross-site scripting) attack in which a nasty fellow inputs evil HTML to make your site go bad and rotten like a hard-boiled egg.