Violoncello

This is not a cello.

A violoncello is a cello. It's the best string instrument ever. If you disagree, expect to find an interesting and quite explosive package arriving in your mail in approximately 3 seconds. No, actually, I take that back. Exactly 3 seconds.

Controversies

It is well known for being possibly homophobic and generally evil. Over-consumption may have laxative effects