Rock Beato

Rock Beato is a vaguely man-sized pile of rocks who falls asleep in his videos. While he ostensibly enjoys telling people his fresh opinions on music, youth, society and the inconvenience of body moss growth, he seems anything but pleased with his nature, or the world he inhabits. He is ostensibly a musician and producer^{[citation needed]}.

Rock Beato failing to stay awake, in midst of a lukewarm take, pretty sure those amps are fake

Early life

Rock Beato began its existence as a lava eruption in the Boomerlithic Age, quickly establishing dominance in his local stratum as a grating voice critical of contemporary art. In the subsequent eras, he was slowly ground down by what he felt was insufficient timber, harmonic complexity and twangy guitars until he became the sleevgy, mossridden pile of basalt he is today.

YouTube career

In what is widely agreed to be a clerical error, Beato was given access to YouTube upload button in March 2011. While he initially showed promise as a vlogger dad, he then went and ruined it by opening his mouth.