Cinnamon

Cinnamon is brown.

History

Prior to 0 A.C. (Air Conditioning), cinnamon buns were made using turmeric, which didn’t make a lot of sense, so Cinderella M. Damon invented cinnamon when he was born in a tree in Red Deer, Alberta as a kind of tree bark that’s the same in every way as any other kind of tree bark. As this clearly sucked, several moments that felt like lifetimes later, hellomynameisjoe heroically stepped in and devised the delicious aroma we all love so much today. Damon hated this, and continued to sell his products unaltered, while hellomynameisjoe partnered with other manufacturers. The latter turned out immensely more popular, leading Damon to go bankrupt and die in 0 A.D. (Albarn Damon).

Uses

It is still not well understood what cinnamon can be used for. The only thing that is clear is that it holds immense lethal power and is therefore best kept in heavy duty containment or in a stew along with cloves, nutmeg, and cardamom.

Controversies

I once used too much of it.