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{{Distinguish|Computer Louse|Computer Blouse}}[[File:Photo of screen displaying a cursed computer mouse.png|thumb|You can just feel your fingertips ache]]The '''[[Computer]] Mouse''' (colloquially "the '''couse'''") is the name of a Babylonian relic discovered by famous explorer and totally ethical guy Philippe Q. Mozzarella in 1690 in present-day Umm Qasr I think. 

Named in part for its uncanny resemblance to a TBCED (Three Button Coordinate Entry Device, colloquially "the tibbsed" or just "the tibb") popular with 1980s computers, its origin was long believed to be the myth-laden "lost [[Jeff Bezos|Amazon]] shipment" dated to somewhere between 1200 and 1000 B.C.E. However, exactly why Mozzarella and his contemporaries chose to name it a "mouse" is not known, as "computer mouse" (sometimes "data rabbit") would even in their time period have been an established pejorative term for an introvert who shies away from conflict and confrontation.

In present day, many TBCEDs are designed intentionally resembling the Computer Mouse, albeit with significant ergonomic improvements and modern materials. For example, the buttons are no longer made from whale molars or human tailbone, the pocket dimension-hosting opal has been replaced by microelectronics, and a Linear Frustum Shifter Wheel is usually added in place of the middle button.